Sunday 30 June 2013

Emotional Infidelity What It Is And How To Recognize It








Emotional infidelity is almost always the first step on the road to cheating, and may well be considered cheating its own right. There is far more to a relationship than just have a physical relationship with only one person and one person only. The truly satisfying and meaningful part of a relationship is the bond you share with the other person.





The emotional connection is a deep and integral part of a relationship, which is what makes emotional infidelity so devastating. The true bond in a relationship goes far beyond just physical fidelity; it's a large part of what makes a relationship a relationship. A relationship is about sharing your thoughts, feeling and soul with another.





Emotional infidelity is when your significant other begins to form those same kinds of bonds with another person. This almost always goes along with withdrawing from the original relationship.





You go from being your significant other's friend and confidant to being a stranger in your own relationship. This freezing out can be difficult to deal with, and may be hard to see. You may feel that the problem is on your end and that you are the one doing something wrong.





At the same time, emotional infidelity involves the other person forming bonds with another person outside the marriage. One of the terrible things about emotional infidelity is that it can be difficult to define and identify. Because there is nothing as obvious as sleeping with another person going on, saying for certain that it is going on is trickier to prove.





One big sign is a sexual chemistry between the two people, flirting and teasing each other. It may seem innocent because there is nothing physical going on, but emotional infidelity will cause the person to behave differently.





This is a key point that you need to keep in mind when you suspect emotional infidelity. Everybody has friends; men have their best buddies, women have their girlfriends. Many people have close friends of the opposite sex, people with whom they confide much of their lives.





This isn't emotional infidelity, and the big thing to look for is signs of guilt. The big sign that someone is becoming involved with someone else on an emotional level is the fact that your significant other feels compelled to hide it. No one hides their relationships with just friends from their significant others. When they're hiding something, it means there is something to hide.





Emotional infidelity is a problem in and of itself, but it tends to be one of the early signs of a relationship going bad. The next step is usually physical infidelity, and this is almost always preceded by emotional infidelity. If you can recognize and do something about emotional infidelity, you may have an easier time than if you catch it at a later stage.





The two big signs are emotional disengagement and secretive behavior. If your significant other is pulling away from you, becoming distance or hostile, this is a big sign. Likewise, if they are acting suspiciously, hiding phone calls and emails, avoiding questions and just generally acting like they have a secret, this is a sign.





You need to catch emotional infidelity in its early stages an fix it. This can be tough to do, but if you suspect emotional infidelity in your relationship, then you need to seek out and advice and instruction on how to fix your relationship.


Saturday 29 June 2013

Break Up Help For Those Still In Love With Their Exs




Still in love with your ex? Looking around for break up help? Well now you find yourself without the person you're still in love with you either have to find help to move on or help to win them back.





If you feel you should move on then the kind of break up help you're going to need depends largely on how bad the relationship and the end of the relationship was. If it was a major drama that really and seriously took it out of you emotionally, then without a doubt you're going to need plenty of time to recover and get over the relationship.





Taking care of yourself is always key after any emotional turmoil, but in this case where you've been tossed around and you still feel that you love your ex, it is even more key. Don't give yourself a hard time for any decisions you made that you now feel in retrospect were wrong decisions. You did the best you could with what you had, so relax and allow yourself to be human.





Make sure that the break up help you need is to look after you and not to look after your ex and what they might be going through. You have left them behind and though you still have strong feelings for them, they are no longer your responsibility.





If you feel you need to talk to a professional to help you put the whole relationship into perspective then you should do this as soon as possible. In a situation where you're still feeling vulnerable and emotional, the sooner you regain your composure and any eroded self-esteem the better.





If the kind of break up help you're looking for is help to get your ex back, then you need to do some of the things outlined above, but then you also have to make sure you're implementing a strategy to bring you full circle so you can make up with your ex.





So follow what's already been outlined: taking care of yourself first and foremost, talk to a professional if you feel you have to and forget about your ex for a few weeks while you recover self-esteem and direction.





Once you're through the initial re-grouping stage, you then make contact with your ex. Ask for a meeting somewhere neutral. When you meet your ex, calmly and without being overly emotional explain that you still have feelings for them. Explain that you've had time to think and you'd like another chance to make your relationship work. Take the time to listen to your ex and hear their point of view, you don't necessarily have to agree with them, but you need to listen.





You then give them time to think and leave to wait for them to call you. Truth is it could go either way. Using this break up help guarantees nothing. Just know this, you have given it your best shot so there is no need to spend endless hours beating yourself up.


Friday 28 June 2013

Should I Get Back Together With My Ex Boyfriend




If you read any agony aunt columns you will often see a letter titled "should I get back together with my ex boyfriend". The answer is always; "It depends!".





It depends on your age, how long you were together, why you broke up and ultimately what both of you want.





What does age have to do with it? Some people met their first love in their early teens and become convinced that this is the only person in the world that matters. For some it works out really well and years later they are celebrating their Golden Jubilee. But for most of us, our passionate youthful infatuations are not real love and we go on to meet our true soul mates. So if you are very young and have just split up with your first boyfriend, you should probably try dating some other boys first to see whether Mr Ex is in fact Mr Right as opposed to Mr Right now. If you have dated a load of men and this man is your ideal mate, then you should make every effort to get back together with him.





How long you were together will also play a part in whether you should make up or not. A couple who have been together a couple of weeks do not know each other that well despite what they may think. The sexual attraction between couples in the early stages of a romance can often blind you to the fact that your partner is not a candidate for a lifelong happy relationship. Emotions run very high in the early days and you could find yourself splitting up on a weekly basis. If this is the case, it is often a sign that there is no future for you at this point in time.





If you have been together for years, you may have split up because you have taken each other for granted. Couples drift apart as life gets in the way. You often find that you spend more quality time with your neighbors and friends than you do with your significant other. Illness, stress and financial worries can also play a part. If you have been together forever and have suddenly split up, then you should make every effort to sit down and discuss your relationship to see is it worth saving. Sometimes, sadly it isn't but at least you will know that you have made every effort.





Why you broke up will partly determine whether you should get back together or not. If you and you ex boyfriend have split because of a silly misunderstanding then you should try getting back together. It is pointless letting your pride stop you from saying sorry if you acted childishly. If on the other hand you have split up due to lies, deceit, fraud or an affair, the decision to get back together is a lot more difficult.





Ultimately it depends on what both of you want. You cannot force someone else to love you even if you do resort to emotional blackmail. Saying I want to get back together with my ex boyfriend is easily achievable if he also wants this to happen.


Thursday 27 June 2013

Getting Boyfriend Back Go Get Him




If you are really interested in getting boyfriend back then you may have to be a bit more assertive than you are used to being. You may have to put yourself in the role of the hunter rather than the hunted. If you are more experienced in being pursued than pursuing than you may be in for a tough time, unless you can figure out a way to hunt that suits your strengths. You have to use the tools that you have at your disposal. You will have to be creative. You will also have to know how guys think and make decisions and use that to your advantage. Getting boyfriend back may rely on the hunter becoming the hunted.





The natural role of the male is that of the hunter. It is usually the guy who wants to go out and capture what he wants. He needs to feel the thrill of the pursuit. He needs to feel like he is attaining something. Yes, he needs to feel like he scored. How do you use that to your advantage? Is there something that you can do to go out and recapture someone who would rather be the one capturing instead of being captured? Yes, there is. Getting boyfriend back is going to cause you to trick the boyfriend back into thinking that he is pursuing you and capturing you.





In getting boyfriend back, you are going to have to use everything that you know about your ex boyfriend. You are going to have to know what he is interested in. You have to know what drives him and what makes him jump at opportunities. You may have to look very closely, though, because things may have changed. Pay close attention to what motivates him to act and then see if you can get and be those things that motivates him.





What this means is that you are going to be using yourself as bait in trying to land this big fish. The greatest draw that will help you in getting boyfriend back is going to be what you cause him to see in you. Become what it is that he wants you to be. Let him see that you are what he is looking for and can’t live without. That you are what he has to have and what he has to go after.





You have to be subtle taking this strategy in getting boyfriend back. You can’t throw yourself down and say, “Here I am!” As attractive as you might be you may have just made yourself boring. What he needs to have is a chase. What you are going to do is cause him to imagine you. You have to give him just a bit of attention and a small piece of what it is that he wants to see and then take it away. Don’t take it too far away, remember ‘out of sight, out of mind’. Your goal is to make yourself just out of reach after making him want to reach out for you. Getting boyfriend back requires a bit of teasing but it is a great way for the hunter to get what they want.


Wednesday 26 June 2013

Easy How To Get Your Ex Girlfriend Back Steps




Just how long or how quickly has it taken you to figure out that you want to find out how to get your ex girlfriend back? Some guys find out the minute their girlfriends walk out on them that they want them back. Other guys don't really find out until they're dating someone else only to discover that 'something's missing' with the new girl. How to get your ex girlfriend back under whatever time lapse, involves the same steps. It can be quick and it can be easy, if you follow some basic steps.





Keep yourself looking smart and fit. It's really easy when you feel down and stressed to find yourself eating the wrong foods and not taking care of yourself. You'd be surprised how quick it is to pile on the pounds in a matter of weeks of self-indulgence. So stop feeling sorry for yourself and get down to the gym or over to the football field with a few of the guys.





If you want to know how to get your ex girlfriend back then after you've had a kick around with the guys, go shower and change and get out on the town and enjoy yourself. It won't necessarily do your chances of getting back with your ex any harm if you casually date another girl. Remember, you're not actually in a relationship with your ex, you might want to be, but until that dream is an actual, you're a free agent. But don't set out to hurt some other girl just because you want to make your ex jealous or just because you're thinking about yourself. Just make it clear to the girl that you're just interested in some fun and nothing more.





Get everything that happened in your past relationship into perspective. There's no point fooling yourself about what went wrong in the relationship. You need to come at this situation with fresh and clear honesty if any reconciliation is going to be effective and long lasting. So if you have mistakes to own up to, if you're sure you want to understand how to get your ex girlfriend back, make sure that you accept your part in the break down of your relationship.





When you're feeling emotionally secure and you've thought through the relationship and have a healthy perspective, make contact with your ex and talk to her. You don't at this point want to put any pressure on her. You simply want to spend a couple of minutes on the phone with her weighing up where she's at and whether you think she's in an approachable mood. Depending on what you deduce, you either ask for a second chance or you retreat and give it more time.


Tuesday 25 June 2013

To Get Back With Ex Face Up To Your Mistakes




To get back with ex after you've made mistakes, means you're no doubt going to have to face some hard home truths! As sure as eggs are eggs, making mistakes in relationships means you have to fix them and apologize for those mistakes before there can be any making up.





When you decide you want to get back with ex, you must be ready to face not only what has gone wrong with the relationship, but also your part in the break down of the relationship. If you made mistakes then don't beat yourself up for that. We all make them, it's what you do after the mistake that's important.





So sit down on your own and take some time to go through what happened and what were the issues that led up to what happened. Don't concern yourself too much with what you see as your ex's mistakes, leave that for the future. Only concern yourself right now with what you can influence.





Whatever mistakes you find in your past behavior, can they be forgiven? Don't be too eager to get down on yourself and believe that your mistakes are basically unforgivable. You would be surprised at the situations that couples find themselves in and that they later recover from. So don't think that your mistakes are beyond forgiveness. There is always hope!





Try and pin point what was happening in your life at the time that led you to make the mistakes, especially if it was completely out of character for you. Remember what I said about facing hard truths, if you want to get back with ex, then you need to do this.





You might discover that you were under certain stresses and strains. Perhaps you were under threat at your job? Or you weren't physically feeling yourself? Or perhaps there were other family issues. Whatever you find when you look back at what happened, you will eventually need to sit down with your ex and explain in detail just what you have found.





If your mistakes were the result of you just being thoughtless or selfish, then this is something about you and your character that can quite easily be fixed. It will take ongoing monitoring but if you are sincerely committed to get back with ex, then it is going to be worthwhile.





When you have come to the point where you have begun to gain perspective about your mistakes, then call your ex and arrange to meet. It is usually better to arrange a face to face meeting somewhere public and neutral because then there is less chance of either of you becoming emotional.





So, make sure that you stay calm and focused on what you want to say. Apologize and ask for forgiveness and then listen carefully to what your ex has to say.


Getting Over Break Up When Your Heart Is Broken








Few things are more painful than having your heart broken.





Both men and women experience the pain of breaking up. Sometimes you are the one who called it off and other times your ex did, but in either case, there is pain on both sides. And, sometimes the break up happened for good reasons while other times it seemed to go up in a puff of smoke for no reason at all. These can be the most painful of all.





If you don’t go about getting over the break up though, there can be some serious consequences. Don’t fall into the trap of lingering over a lost love. The worst trap of all is to start to write a “victim story” that makes you the protagonist in a tale of love gone bad.





First of all, you should realize that if you don’t get over your ex, it will be toxic to any future relationship you might have.





Second, realize that you can’t run away from it, medicate it, or suppress it. You have to face the pain head on and deal with it.





There’s no way out of a broken heart. There’s only a way through. Accept that there is going to be pain. Use the time during this period to understand the hurt. Some ways to do this are to write in a journal, get counseling, or pour your heart out in song. Realize there are no quick solutions to getting over break up.





Next, you need to examine whether there is anything in your past that would have lead to this break up. For instance, did the abuse in your childhood cause you to be an abuser in this relationship? Take note of those things because they will help you foster healthier relationships in the future.





Don’t paint yourself as the victim of the relationship either. Take responsibility for your actions. While your ex may have been the one whose “fault” was the immediate cause of the break up, the truth is that the underlying circumstances were caused by both of you.





By getting rid of your “victim story” you become a healthier, more attractive partner for a future boyfriend or girlfriend. You’ll begin to see that your “victim story” was composed of beliefs, attitudes and thoughts that color your perceptions about everything. It becomes a self fulfilling prophesy.





When you handle your broken heart badly, you perpetuate your pain. You’ll never go about getting over break up.





But, when you can handle your emotions with the ultimate goal of letting them go, you enable healing.





Getting over a broken heart takes work. It also takes time. Don’t underestimate the factors which go into curing your heartbreak.





You’ve just lost a person who was extremely important to your life. But, use this time for growth and you will become a stronger person and have better relationships in the future. That is how you really go about getting over break up.


Monday 24 June 2013

Do I Want My Husband Back




If you ask yourself, “Do I want my husband back?” and the answer is yes, then you’re one of millions of women who have been through a break up and decided that they didn’t want to go through with it after all. Maybe you didn’t want it from the start, or maybe you did and now you’ve changed your mind. “Do I want my husband back?” is one of those questions that make you consider a great many things.





A lot of it has to do with isolation and loneliness. That’s not to say that you only think about taking your husband back because you’re lonely. Not true. But the loneliness that often comes after a breakup or a divorce can be quite a shot for anyone. “Do I want my husband back?” often arises out of the uncomfortable shock of finally being alone.





You should never take your husband back because of fear or boredom. A common fear is the fear of being alone and having face life’s difficulties alone. But the fear of being alone isn’t a good enough reason to decide you want to get back together with your husband.





If you stay together out of fear, the relationship can’t possibly grow naturally. Doesn’t he deserve to be with someone who genuinely wants to be with him? Not someone who stays because she believes there is no choice and they have to stay together.





You both deserve a better and more fulfilling relationship that one of obligation like that. Two people should be together because they want to be together, not for any other reasons.





So if you ask, ‘Do I want my husband back?” and the answer is yes, you really do, not just because you feel it’s expected that you be married, then you should try to get him. There are a few different ways you can head for this goal.





Be the woman you were when you got married. Of course, it’s impossible to go back in time completely. But all you have to do is essentially be the same person in some of your more pleasant actions.





When you first got together there was something about you that attracted him. Whether it was that you were sweet, thoughtful or attentive depends on the person’s perception.





Maybe over the last several years of the marriage, you haven’t been nearly as attentive as you could be. You should at least be happy that he would never have noticed the drop in affection, if you hadn’t been so good at lavishing it on him in the first place. But once he’s had that great attention, it becomes obvious when it’s gone.





And it’s easy for it to disappear after a while. We have a terrible tendency to take the people we love for granted all the time. Often that’s one of the factors leading up to a break up or divorce. If you ask yourself, “Do I want my husband back?” and you do, make an effort to not take him for granted anymore.


Sunday 23 June 2013

Win Ex Boyfriend Back With Dignity








When you try to win ex boyfriend back you may feel like you need to go begging on your hands and knees. You may feel that you have to lower yourself and lose every bit of pride that you have. The breakup may have gone a long way towards hurting your pride as it is, there is no need to further hurt your self image. There is no reason that you shouldn't be able to win ex boyfriend back and retain some dignity.





You may feel that you need to go begging back to him but there are things that you can do that won't make that necessary. If you got dumped that was enough to hurt the way you look at yourself. If you broke up with him then, realizing you made a huge mistake, you may feel that you have to go crawling back to ask for forgiveness. That may not be what you need to do to win ex boyfriend back.





If he broke up with you, think about what it was that drew him to you in the first place. What was the attitude you had then? How was your spirit? If you want to rekindle that love that was once there, try putting all the elements back that caused the fire in the first place. Whatever you do, let yourself be visible to him. Let him see that you are still the same person that he fell in love with once. Let him also know that you know he sees you. Be obvious that you are that person again. If he doesn't notice you, someone else just might and that might not be a bad thing. You can lead a horse to water but you can't make him drink. If there is another horse there, they may be more appreciative of what you have to offer.





If you broke up with him, and you believe that it was a mistake, let him know. Let him know that he has every right to be mad but tell him that you don't expect to have him come back. Tell him, “Whatever happens from this point is OK with me. I just wanted to let you know that I made a big mistake with you and I'm sorry if I hurt you.” Ask for forgiveness, but don't beg for it. Begging is not a good way to win ex boyfriend back.





Also, don't ask to be reunited. You should let him know that you don't expect a second chance and you probably don't deserve one but you really wish that things had worked out differently. Say your piece and then walk away. If he is interested in getting back together with you or is curious about what you are trying to do then let him make the move. It takes strength and character to admit a mistake and an equal amount of it to take the consequences. If he is as special as you believe him to be, he will notice what you have just done and will want to be your boyfriend once again.





Unless you have some amazing love spells, you may find it a huge challenge to win ex boyfriend back. If he is the one and the result is supposed to be marriage or a life long relationship then it will happen. The trick is to get him involved and make it seem like he is pursuing you. Make him want you, again. As hard as it is to do and as humiliated as you could feel, just know that there is a way to win ex boyfriend back and have some dignity doing it.


Saturday 22 June 2013

How To Win Ex Back Battle For Her Heart




Do you know how to win ex back? When a woman has left a man, she probably has a good reason, at least in her own mind. Thus, you have to be prepared to battle for her heart if you want to win ex back.





A relationship has a beginning, a middle and an end. The question is whether you are in the middle and just taking a hiatus or whether it is really over and you are at the end.





If your girlfriend wants to start the relationship anew, you need to be able to work things out on a fresh start. You should plan out your steps ahead of time if you want the new relationship to work out better than the old one did.





First of all, consider why you broke up. Were there underlying problems that plagued your relationship? If so, how can you fix them going forward?





Second, analyze why you want your ex back. Do you just feel lonely because she’s not around? If so, any woman will do. But, if you have a hole in your heart that only she will fill, that’s different.





Third, you need to become the person that she needs. Think back to what you were like when she fell in love with you. Have you changed? Did you stop doing interesting things when you devoted all of your time to her? Have you stopped going to the gym thinking that there’s no reason to stay in shape now that you’ve snagged the girl? Become the person she wants to win ex back.





Fourth, consider that the first thing you say to your ex after a break up may be the most important words ever to come out of your mouth. The wrong words can change the balance of the relationship. Don’t beg her to come back. Don’t do anything to irritate her. She probably still harbors good feelings for you and you don’t want to do anything that would change this.





Fifth, you can use the good memories you’ve built to your advantage. Talk about the good times you had. If she gave you a special sweater, wear it when you know she’s going to be around. If you can, arrange to meet at a place that has meaning for you for a quick drink.





Sixth, try to mirror her words and body language. If she uses an uncommon word, try to work it into the conversation yourself. If she places her left hand on her cheek, do the same. Don’t overdo it or be obvious, but this kind of “mirror imaging” gets you back in synch.





Seventh, let her know that you are thinking about her. Go out of your way to send her a card on her birthday. If you know she has a big review at work, send her an encouraging note.





By following these seven steps, you should be able to win ex back. As long as you are still on friendly terms, you can use your friendship to become romantic once more.


Friday 21 June 2013

Understanding The Wife Husband Relationship




The wife husband relationship can be a complicated one. Many marriages fail because one or both partners don’t really understand the dynamic of the relationship. If even one person has a basic understanding of it, the marriage is bound to be stronger. But if both people understand how a wife husband relationship works, then it has the best chance of being a good marriage.





One of the keys to understanding the wife husband relationship is to realize just how different men and women really are. Aside from the obvious physical differences, the sexes are different emotionally and mentally, too.





When faced with a problem, for instance, men and women tend to approach it from completely different angles. Women are more likely to discuss it with other people. They might get advice and input from a few friends. It’s not uncommon for women to talk about the problem at length.





That’s because women solve problems when they talk about them. They explore all the angles of the issue and how they feel about it, and often in doing so a solution appears.





Men, on the other hand, tend to be more tight-lipped about problems. They think about it more than they talk about it. It’s more common for a man to ponder a problem and say little until he’s figured out the solution.





In the wife husband relationship this difference in problem solving can itself be a problem. He might think that she’s talking it to death when she should be trying to figure it out herself. And she might think he’s not even worried about something because he’s not talking about it .When in reality, it’s on his mind all the time and he’s just not pointing it out.





Sometimes, women tend to talk about things that they don’t necessarily want help with, or advice about. They simply want someone to listen to their opinion and thoughts. Where if a man is talking about something, it’s because he wants an answer.





If a woman is talking about something just to get it off her chest or vent, other women tend to get that and offer support. They don’t try to tell her what to do for the most part, but simply join in the conversation in empathy.





A man might simply state a solution and tell the woman what she should do, thinking he’s being very helpful and doing what he’s supposed to. But really, the woman will feel that he’s not listening and instead just trying to end the conversation.





Of course, not every wife husband relationship will happen exactly like these examples. Some men will talk out a problem and some women will be tight-lipped about it. But in general, the sexes can be expected to follow these typically patterns.





Understanding those patterns can help you stop yourself before you do something that’s natural to you. You can think about what your partner needs from you instead, and do that .Your wife husband relationship will be much stronger and happier because of it.


Thursday 20 June 2013

Win Ex Boyfriend Back From That Girl




You want to win ex boyfriend back because he was yours and for some reason she has him now. If you believe that the two of you should be together then it is very likely that you are. But how are you going to do this? You have to play it smart and dignified if you are going to win ex boyfriend back.





She may want to play nasty to keep him away from you but if you get nasty right back then all you will be doing is feuding and you are too big for that. What you want to do is show him that you are more mature than she is and more like a real woman while that other girl is immature.





If your first instinct is to fight, suppress it. Rise above it. Gain control of your emotions and the other girl may be exposed for being the immature girl she is. If you look favorable compared to her then it will only be too obvious that you are the better choice. Rather than resorting to curses, resort to positive feelings. Be the obvious better choice and you stand a greater chance to win ex boyfriend back.





If she treats him poorly then talk to his friends. They may be feeling the same way. IF it keeps going you may have grounds to have an intervention. Talk with their friends and find out with them what you could do together to get him out of that situation. If you want to win ex boyfriend back it will be easier if you have his friends working with you. Much of the best ways to win ex boyfriend back from her is going to be using his friends.





If it seems like he is under some love spells that she put on him, find out what it is that she has over him and try to find ways to show that he deserves better. Let his friends know that he deserves better. They may very well agree with you. If she has him obsessed with her and she is forcing him to spend time with her instead of them, they will want to get him back. If you are on their side, they will be on yours.





If are able to convince others who know him well that their friend is better off with you then you will have a lot smaller of a battle to fight. There will be so many people against that relationship that it could crumble under the pressure. The secret to having this work in your favor is to be behind the scenes. Let others do the work for you. That way if that other girl catches on you can make her seem like she is paranoid for thinking that you are causing all their problems.





The key to getting what you want, which is to win ex boyfriend back, is to have as many people on your side as possible. It doesn't have to be you against the two of them. It could be the two of them against the world. When their relationship falls apart, you will find it easier to win ex boyfriend back.


Wednesday 19 June 2013

Win Your Love Back The Example Of Katie And Brad








You can win your love back. Let me give you an example.





Katie made a major mistake. She saw Brad talking to her best friend Andrea and thought he was flirting with her. Katie worked herself into a fury and broke up with Brad.





It turns out that he was really consulting Andrea on how to put together a surprise romantic Valentine’s date. He was really hurt that Katie would think so little of him and didn’t want to have to do anything to do with her after that.





You may think that you can not win your love back after such a situation. But let me tell you what Katie did to get Brad back.





Brad wasn’t talking to her, so she couldn’t discuss the situation with him. But she could write him a letter. She got some nice paper and hand wrote an apology. She admitted that she had flown off the handle. She also told him what she liked about him and about the relationship. Finally, she expressed gratitude for his thoughtfulness in planning a romantic date.





Then, she shut up. She didn’t call, text or email him for a week. By not pestering him, she gave him time to work through his emotions.





After a week, she sent him a short and sweet “thinking of you” email. She kept it casual.





Brad was obviously nuts about Katie because he was willing to go to the trouble of impressing her on Valentine’s day. But, he was also hurt. Because Katie had apologized and given him time to work through his emotions, he was able to respond to the “thinking of you” email.





The night he got the email, he called Katie. She tried to keep things light and fun. Brad appreciated that. So, he suggested they meet for coffee and Katie agreed.





Katie went out of her way to look like a million bucks. She wore the earrings Brad had given her for Christmas and she put on the perfume that he liked so much.





Katie decided that she would only talk about positive things. She especially tried to bring fond memories into the conversation. She also asked about his family because that would reinforce their shared history and closeness.





Brad appreciated this. He loved Katie and didn’t want things to end. But, he didn’t want a repeat of the situation either. He needed to be reassured that their life together wouldn’t be filled with needless drama. He also needed to know that talking to another woman wouldn’t set off fireworks.





The couple agreed that they would take the relationship to a less intense level. They would really court each other again. They would stop taking each other for granted.





A year later, Brad and Katie agree that the break up may have actually saved their relationship over the long haul. While Katie initially flew off the handle, her calm handling of the situation afterward made it possible for them to move on. She showed you can win your love back.


Tuesday 18 June 2013

Still In Love With My Ex Girlfriend - How To Get Her Back




Many men tell me 'I'm still in love with my ex girlfriend.' They want to know if there's anything they can do to get her back. The very first question to ask men who think they want their ex back is to ask what they've already tried.





A man who is serious about getting his ex girlfriend back will usually say he's repeatedly tried to tell her how much he loves her and needs her. He's reassured her that he'll change and the relationship will be different if she gives him a second chance. This kind of begging and pleading simply shows a woman that you're desperate and often drives them even further away.





Some men will try the opposite tactic to pleading and they'll turn to bribery. Buying her expensive gifts or taking her to fancy restaurants in an attempt to impress her won't work either. She may accept your tokens, but bribery isn't the way to win back love.





The vast majority of women want to be in a relationship with a man who will listen to what she has to say. Even if she's just making small talk, it's important to her that she's heard. This doesn't mean you have to agree with everything she says. You just need to listen.





When asked if they're willing to listen to their ex girlfriends, men who are trying hard to get back their ex often say 'I've tried to listen, but she doesn't listen to a word I say.' Sometimes when men think they're listening, what they're really doing is hearing the problem and then immediately talking back to offer a solution to fix whatever problem his girlfriend is having. He believes because she doesn't hear a word he says that she's not listening.





However, only hearing the parts of the conversation you think you can help her with and then trying to make her listen to you first is not the same as YOU listening to your girlfriend's needs. Women appreciate men who listen to them. Unfortunately, men communicate in slightly different ways, which could probably have been a contributing factor to your break up in the first place.





If you're still thinking 'I'm still in love with my ex-girlfriend and want to get her back', then practice listening. Ask her a question and then listen to what she says intently. Make a comment about her response or ask another question relating to her response, but don't try to fix it or dismiss it as unimportant. Simply listen to her.





Women assume that a man who listens to her really cares. It tells you that you understand and that you're really interested. The next time you receive an opportunity to get together with your ex, take some time to establish eye contact and really listen intently to what she says.





At first, you might find your ex-girlfriend is a little confused or guarded about your sudden change, but when she realizes that you are interested in what she's saying she'll begin to relax and realize that you do care. She'll immediately begin wondering why her feelings for you went away and they should come rushing back when she understands that you really do still love your ex and really do want her back.


Monday 17 June 2013

How To Get Guy Back If Hes Walked Out On You




Finished with your guy? Want to desperately get guy back? Then you're going to have to use a strategy that will help you get him back and not cause him to head for the hills!





Firstly remember that just because you want him back it doesn't mean that he wants to come back. If you've broken up before and your relationship has become a breakup/makeup merry go round, pretty soon one or both of you will want to one day get off that particular ride for good. So, there is a chance that he might have reached this point, no matter what you now feel and want.





Secondly to get guy back you're really going to have to look at the relationship as a whole, not just the parts you're comfortable looking at, because only then can you begin to find out what's causing the problems.





If you need outside third party help to scrutinize your relationship, then it's always worthwhile getting that help. If you have good and honest friends who will tell you what you need to hear, as opposed to what you want to hear, then talk to them.





You should also understand that to pull this off you're going to have to stop acting on whim and emotion and start working a well thought out proven plan. This is probably the most crucial step you will need to take, so get yourself under control. Sit down and plan to do whatever it takes to stop yourself running around making things worse – stop calling him, texting him and trying to force him to see you because begging and pleading won't work.





Instead, occupy yourself by getting out and meeting new people, take a class, get fit, whatever it takes to help you re-focus and approach the whole situation from a point of clarity and calmness, is what you need to do.





Especially take the time to look at why you want to get guy back, because to be honest, too many people find themselves back with their exs only to discover a few weeks down the line that they have made a huge mistake. So just because you want to get guy back right now, ask yourself if you really should?





If you've come to the conclusion that getting this guy back is the right move for you, then once you have yourself under control and you've thought things through, then your next move is to call and talk to him.





Understand that he may very well need more time before he is ready to speak to you never mind, entertain the idea of rekindling your relationship. Your goal, if this happens, is not to force the situation. Instead, tell him that you understand completely and then tell him you will give him more time to think things through. Leave it at that and continue living your life and keeping yourself busy.


Sunday 16 June 2013

Win Ex Boyfriend Back In 7 Easy Steps








Has your guy just dumped you? It really hurts doesn’t it? Well, here’s how to win ex boyfriend back in 7 easy steps.





1. Do you really want him back? Okay, this may seem like an odd step to go through, but it is really important. Your boyfriend may seem indispensible, but you will be able to move on without him. If he’s someone worth keeping, read on. But if he’s just “any old guy” don’t hang on for the sake of hanging on. As the old saying goes, “there are other fish in the sea.”





2. Think about why you broke up. Think carefully about what he said when he dumped you. Also think back to the things he said to you in the days right before you broke up. He may have indicated that you were too clingy or that you had let yourself go. If he wants you to change, you have to decide whether you want to be the girlfriend he wants to have.





3. Don’t bug him. Sometimes, girls think that they should call or text their ex a bunch of times hoping that showing how much they love their guy will get him back. Instead, you should give him some space. This will let both of you evaluate the relationship. If you are in school together, you don’t need to go out of your way to avoid him, but don’t chase him down either.





4. Don’t manipulate him. You may be tempted to flirt with his friends, for instance, in an attempt to make him jealous. More likely, it will just make him annoyed and put him off you. He may even think you are acting slutty. So, stay away from doing manipulative actions.





5. Play hard to get. Don’t let him think that he can wiggle his little finger and you will come rushing to his side. Let him squirm a little bit. Remember guys like the chase.





6. Don’t send friends as emissaries. It’s common for girls to send their girlfriends to “feel out” your ex. But this just annoys guys. If you are going to communicate something to him, do it yourself. Don’t put him in the awkward position of having to explain his feelings to your friends.





7. Don’t get worried about a new girlfriend. It’s probably just a rebound relationship. It is not uncommon for a guy to hook up with a new girl right after he has broken up with you. But these rebound relationships rarely last. It is very possible that he will come back to you after he has some time to work things out. In the meantime, become everything he wants in a girl. Get gorgeous. Be friendly. Be happy. These things will pry him away from the good time girl and back into your arms.





Many girls don’t know how to win ex boyfriend back. They do it all wrong and end up pushing him away instead. When you follow the seven steps in this article, you will be able to come out a winner in the game of love.


Tips On How To Get Your Ex Boyfriend Back




Getting dumped by your boyfriend is no fun and if you're still in love with him then you're probably desperately trying to find help on how to get your ex boyfriend back. Following the tips I'm about to outline for you is a great start that will set you on the right road to winning him back.





The worst thing that you can do in your quest to understand how to get your ex boyfriend back, is to get desperate and needy. Desperate and needy spells out of control and high maintenance. Boyfriends hate out of control and high maintenance because it means they never know what you'll do and where you'll do it and so they're never at ease. Letting your ex boyfriend see that you're out of control is a surefire way to drive him away, so if this is you, you need to stop.





Not only that in this state, you hand over far too much power to your ex boyfriend and you could find yourself taken advantage of big time. So if you want him back, don't set yourself up for a possibly painful and frustrating time.





What you should also avoid is to make yourself too readily available to your ex as you try and work out how to get your ex boyfriend back. Show him that you value and have pride in yourself and that you're not sitting home waiting for him to call. Get out and about and show him that you've got your life together and that you've taken the breakup in your stride. Having him believe anything else makes your goal to get him back an up hill battle that you will probably lose. So don't sit at home obsessing about what he might or might not be up to. Get yourself out!





If you want to get him back, make sure that you're looking after yourself. After all, you need to give him something to want to come back to and that means not letting yourself go. Instead of staying home consoling yourself with chocolate and soda make sure that you hit the gym and keep on hitting it! Start eating healthily and be sure you're always looking your best when you're out and about. Not only will all of this make you look good, but it will do the world of good for your self-esteem which has no doubt taken a huge blow through all of this.





Now everything outlined works together, so if you're after the best results don't apply each step in isolation. They all impact on each other and that's how you should use these steps when you're trying to understand how to get your ex boyfriend back.


Saturday 15 June 2013

Thinking Of Divorce Save Marriage With A Marriage Counselor








Are you thinking of divorce? Save marriage by seeing a marriage counselor. There are many therapists who say they do marriage counseling, but how do you know which ones are really good? This article will give you a checklist of things to look for in a family therapist.





First of all, you want to see what their credentials are. There are three basic classes of counselors.





The first is the Ph.D. or Psy.D. level counselor. These people went to graduate school for a minimum of five years and wrote a dissertation. In addition, they performed a minimum of 3000 hours of therapy under the supervision of an experienced psychologist. In order to legally call yourself a “clinical psychologist” the person must have a doctoral level degree. Ph.D.’s are often more academic in nature and tend to do scholarly and forensic work along with therapy.





Then there is the M.S.W. This means Master of Social Work. Social Workers are trained to apply social theory to specific situations. They can work in institutions or with individuals.





Finally, there is the M.S. or M.A. in Counseling. Often called a “Marriage and Family Therapist,” these people can only work with individuals or small groups in counseling situations. They tend to have 2 year degrees and may not have written a thesis. They have 1500 hours of therapy under supervision.





If you are using your insurance to cover your marriage counseling, your insurance company will probably direct you to an MSW or a Marriage and Family Therapist because they are less expensive.





Second, you have to determine what the price will be. Clinical psychologists tend to be the most expensive while Marriage and Family Therapists are the least expensive. Remember you are trying to stop divorce. Save marriage by finding the best fit not the most (or least) expensive professional.





Look at the per session cost as well as the overall cost for the expected length of treatment.





Often, therapists working in groups or non profit institutions will have a sliding scale fee based on a couple’s income. If you qualify, this might make counseling affordable when it otherwise might not be.





Third, you need to look at the policies the therapist has. Some of these policies include:





· What happens if you miss or cancel a session?



· Can you take a pre-planned vacation without having to pay for the session?



· Will the therapist accept calls outside of the normal session? Do they accept calls at home or just at the office?



· Is there an alternative person you can call in an emergency?





A family counselor should help you put your family back together so that you don’t have split up. Saving your marriage should be their ultimate goal. If you don’t feel that you are in synch with your counselor, move on and find someone who can keep you from divorce and save marriage.


Friday 14 June 2013

Evaluating Your Relationship With Your Partner - Before You Take Your Relationship To The Next Level




It doesn't matter if you've been in a relationship for a while or if it's brand new, most people will reach a point where they are considering taking their relationship to the next level. The next level could mean anything from physical intimacy to a walk down the aisle. No matter what the next level is for you, now is the time to start evaluating your relationship with your partner.





While it may seem like this would be an easy thing to do it can actually be very difficult. There are a few reasons why achieving an honest evaluation can be a tough thing for people:





1) If you wait too long to honestly access the quality and strength of your relationship you may already be in too deep to be able to objectively analyze the weak points in your partner and your relationship.





Once you've fallen for that person you will see only what you want to see. Few people will still have the strength to honestly admit that there might be a problem. They will turn a blind eye and pretend that everything is great.





2) During the early days and most of the 'dating phase' of a relationship your partner, and you, can be very guarded and careful of what they let the other see. With some people it's a deliberate attempt to hide their true colors with other's it's a more innocent "putting the best foot forward" type of thing.





Either way this tendency can make an honest evaluation very difficult.





One of the most important things you can do to try to have a secure and fulfilling relationship is to honestly evaluate the strength of your partner and the relationship early on.





It's also important to take your time. Too many people ignore the warning signs because they just want to be with someoone so badly they are willing to be mis-treated just so they don't have to be alone.





If you really want a strong relationship make sure you are strong first. If you are happy with you and you have made a full life for yourself filled with people and activities that make you happy, then you won't be so desperate for a relationship that you allow yourself to be mis-treated.





Honestly evaluating your relationship with your partner is something everyone should do, but few actually do. The earlier you do it the easier it will be to see things clearly as they really are and not just as you want them to be. That is the difference between a happy and loving relationship and an unhappy and potentiallly abusive relationship.


Thursday 13 June 2013

Im Still In Love With My Ex But I Think Its Over For Good




If you're saying “I'm still in love with my ex,” but you feel like it's finally over for good, then you need to stop looking on dark side and think positively. There are plenty of relationships that look as if they're over, but the reality is that people find a way back together.





Before you launch into a full on attempt to win back your love, make sure your relationship is a relationship that should be saved! Too often relationships that should remain dead are revived with dire consequences. So ask yourself this: “did your relationship involve physical and or emotional abuse?” If the answer is yes you need to accept that this kind of relationship is best left over with. Instead work at restoring any eroded self-esteem and move on.





However, if your relationship was simply a falling out, misunderstanding or maybe a loss of trust then that is completely recoverable even if only one of you wants it, you just have to find the right course.





What's good about declaring “I'm still in love with my ex!” is you no doubt had a really strong relationship with your ex and if you feel that you're still in love with them, then chances are they feel the same about you.





Provided some weeks have past, you should take a moment to call your ex and ask if you can have a talk with them. Don't make it sound as though you are begging and pleading for the meeting, just make it sound as casual as you can.





Arrange for the meeting to take place somewhere neutral where neither of you will be tempted to cause a scene or let your emotions take over. If you are really seriously stating that “I'm still in love with my ex” then you will need to take some time to figure out what you are going to say to get them back.





You don't need to take notes, but you need to have it clear in your mind. So be sure to take some time to figure out why you want your ex back. Yes you're still in love with them and that in itself is a good reason, but try and give your ex tangible reasons why they should take you back.





Talk about your dreams and aspirations and explain to them where you see them fitting into those dreams and aspirations, however don't make the mistake of making your ex the be all and end all of your dreams. Don't put yourself in a position where if they don't agree to the reconciliation that your dreams are ruined. You don't want to come across as needy and fixated, you just want your ex to know that there is a real place for them in your life.





You then need to give your ex the space to express themselves and you need to listen to what they say. Do all of that and your declaration that “I'm still in love with my ex” should give you a reciprocal answer from your ex.


Wednesday 12 June 2013

How To Win Ex Girlfriend Back With An Apology




No doubt all you can think about now she's walked out on you is how to win ex girlfriend back. Possibly you didn't realize that you loved her, or perhaps how much you loved her, until she walked out on you and now you're in pain and desperate to figure out how to win ex girlfriend back.





Well here's some information that will help you as you try to figure out the right moves that will help you get her back in your arms.





You might have made some mistakes, we've all been there, so don't beat yourself up! The most constructive thing to do right now is not to try and rewrite history, instead you need to figure out how to step up and find a way to write the future for the two of you, that you want.





If you need to apologize for anything that you did wrong, then get ready to do so. What you should also do, is to make sure that you understand why you're apologizing. Don't just go through the motions of an apology because you think it's what she wants to hear. No, look at the behavior that she's objecting to and try and understand her point of view.





The apology that you now come up with has to address two points if you're serious about figuring out how to win ex girlfriend back. Make sure that you use the apology to convince your ex girlfriend that you have completely understood her point of view and also that you're one hundred percent ready to change that behavior.





It will be great if you have previously come up with a plan to prove to your ex that you're rally serious. By that I mean do you need to go and talk to a professional about your behavior? Well then make the appointment and make sure that you have actually attended a few sessions and are committed to continuing to talking to the professional. Just a word of warning, if you're not sincere in this, you're wasting your time even trying to fool your ex girlfriend.





If you cheated on her, then try and figure out why you cheated. Again, you can't rewrite history, but if you can begin to figure out what brought you to the point of cheating, then the next time you find yourself in that situation you will have a real shot at avoiding it. Explain your thought process to your ex girlfriend and own your behavior.





When you go to talk to your girlfriend, as you attempt to answer your question how to win back ex girlfriend, make sure you give her space to say what she has to say and listen with sincerity. Do all of the above and you're well on your way to getting her back.


Tuesday 11 June 2013

Christian Marriage Counseling Getting God Inspired Guidance








Christian marriage counseling is used by many couples striving to follow God's will and seek His guidance when the need for marriage counseling has come. When you marriage is struggling it is important for couples to get good advice from marriage counselors. If you are Christians then it very well may be that you need to get marriage counseling from someone coming from the same place.





The problems that you have in your marriage may be an inability to relate to each other for some reason. It could be due to more serious problems such as adultery, pornography, lying, or many other things. Whatever the reason, it is incredibly important that you seek a counselor to help you help the marriage.





The advice that you may get from secular marriage counselors may be good but also may not give you guidance that comes from God's word. There are many counseling choices available to you that can turn to before your marriage ends up in divorce. The best way for many to avoid that has been Christian marriage counseling.





Many churches now have marriage & family counselors on staff and may also have a counseling center. They are able to provide many types of counseling services but are of great help in family therapy and Christian marriage counseling. They will not just try and help you solve problems in your marriage but will be able to help make your marriage stronger and draw you closer to God.





A good Christian marriage counseling program will have a counselor that will draw you and your spouse back together and will help draw you closer to God, together. It will help you get your priorities back in line so that the two of you will be able to focus on things that are more important.





It is really important that you do not hesitate to find help if you are having problems. The longer you wait, the harder it will be to fix the problems. This is no time to be in denial. You need to get things back on track and Christian marriage counseling can help you accomplish that.





The hardest thing that you may have to face is trying to convince the one you love that getting counseling is important. It may be necessary to go and seek advice from a counselor on the best way to get your loved one to go in for counseling.





There is a lot to risk either way. There may be some things uncovered that will be uncomfortable to talk about but facing those issues and addressing them has to be done. You will also have to learn a lot of humility as you may find out that you are the source of some of the problems. You may also find out that there is very little that can be done to save the relationship but still you will have done everything you can to save it.





If your marriage is important to you and you are trying to have a Christian family, then finding a Christian marriage counseling program is of the utmost importance.